Getting Along With Your Co-workers




Often in life, we are teamed up with people we do not like or do not get along with. We have to work with others that rub us the wrong way or treat us badly. We cannot always choose the people we work with, and therefore we have to find a way to relate to them that makes our experience with them easier during the day. How we relate to others plays a huge part in how we experience them. If we continually relate to them the same way based upon our feelings about them, then we will always experience them as the same.


We can get locked into viewing the other person as an obstacle, as an enemy, or as a threat. Once we decide this, it is awfully hard to change how we feel and see them differently. We must remember that even if someone is hard to deal with, how we experience them can be different and feel easier. We can have an easier time during the day if we change how we see this other person. There are many different ways to look at a person, and the one you choose will affect how you feel about them. Imagine letting go of the conscious choice you have made about what you think of this other person. Imagine trying to see them for the first time, without all the experiences you have had with them. Imagine no views, no agendas, or opinions and start there.


Start by seeing them just as a person without any added perceptions that you have made. Look at them for who they are and nothing else. They are a person who is living their life as they have chosen to. If you do not approve or accept their ways of being, this only makes it twice as hard for you to relate to them. If you can accept that this person is living their life their way, then perhaps you can let go of the struggle against them. See them as a person who is separate from you. Do not internalize how you feel about them so that is all they exist as. Try to separate your emotions and thoughts from this person and see them for who they are. You do not need to approve of someone in order to be around them; try instead to accept them as they are. Try to see them as a person who is living their life in a way that makes sense to them, even if it makes no sense to you.


We may not be able to understand why people act or treat others the way they do, but we do not have to fight it; we can accept it. We can accept that this is who they are, and the struggle against them can fall away. How we experience them becomes easier if we just see them as another person and accept them for who they are. We take away the obstacle once we allow ourselves to be okay with what they are. We cannot change others; all we can do is accept them for who they are. Do not mix your emotions or perceptions in with their behavior. Try to keep them separate. Do not involve your agenda or ideas into how they should be. Let this go.


Know that you cannot control others; you can only control how you feel when you are around them. You cannot change your co-workers or who they are. The easiest road is to accept them for who they are, even if you do not approve. You can only help yourself by letting go of the internal struggle you experience when you are around them. People will continue to be who they are no matter what. We can either experience them as an obstacle or as another person who is living their life as they have chosen. Separate yourself from them and accept them for who they are and how they behave. Let go of what you do not approve of, and exist instead in a place of acceptance. Your days will feel easier, even if your co-workers are hard to be with. Do not try to change, control, or fight who they are. Let them be as they are and you will find it easier to deal with the people you work with.


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