Guiding Your Child

When we are raising our children, we are guiding them toward the life they will lead. We have a huge impact on who they will become and how they will develop. How we act towards them will become, in a sense, how they will respond to others. How we relate to them is how they will develop relationships as well. All of what we do is listened to and followed by example. This can seem overwhelming and intense, but by staying present with the child, we can easily lead and guide them. It is important that we are aware of who they are and what they need to grow into the best possible person they can be.

In order to guide them, we must listen and be present with them, for parenting is not about managing or controlling, but about sharing, cooperating, and being together. We are their teachers; we are their link to knowledge, both internally and with the world. We can help them develop in many ways if we are open to seeing them for who they are. Remember, each child is unique, and when we stop seeing them for who they are, we forget our role as parents. We are supposed to be guiding them into who they will become; we do this by example, by words, thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. We are constantly observed, as children are very aware of the world around them. This is why we also need to be aware; we need to observe and listen to them too.

When we value the child’s behavior and feelings as something independent from us, we begin to see them as an individual. Sometimes it is easy to forget who they are and what they need when we are in the role of a parent. Try to connect, listen, observe, and feel what they need. When you do this, your guidance as a parent will become stronger, as you are connecting to them in a real way. What you say and do will make more sense because it is what they can understand and even need from you.

Try to connect daily; constantly be present and listen to them. See the child for who they are, instead of only responding to them in the parental role. Try to not overlook the being that resides in them, and respond to them for who they are at that moment. The more you do this, the more you listen and connect, the easier it is to guide them, for you will feel and know the best way. We feel lost on how to guide our child when we are not connected to them. We forget that they are a person just like us, only far more moldable and open. Try to connect from a place without ideas, thoughts, or emotions; try only to be with the real person they are. By being present, your guidance will come through in a way that is best because you are really there with them -- one-on- one, present, and engaged.

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