How To Forgive Yourself and Let Go Of Regrets




Forgiving yourself for things you've done may be more important than you think. For we usually only think of others, that we should forgive them, but do we forgive ourselves? Do we forgive our regrets, our past, and what we have done? Do we forgive what we shouldn't have let happen or made happen? Often we carry around our past solely because we haven't forgiven ourselves. We haven't let go because we still feel the blame for what has happened and what we may have done. This could be the thing that is keeping your past tied to you and in the end holding you down. Regret can be a very heavy tool toward self-incrimination. We use it all the time, to explain to ourselves why we did something, and why it wasn't okay. If we regret, then we can manage with what has happened. But regret is a weight. It is something that holds us down and keeps us in our past; it does not let us go.


By forgiving ourselves, our pasts, and what we've done, we also let go of regret. For regret goes hand in hand with judgment on ourselves. Think of it this way, if someone did something horrible to you, after a time wouldn't you want them to feel better about it, to let them know that even though it hurt, it is okay, that you forgive them? Should we not do the same for ourselves? We are the most important person in our life; our view of ourselves sheds the light on how we live. If we regret or feel shame for an occurrence in our past, how do we live in the present? It is a heavy thing to carry and be reminded of something that is long gone, to always remember with regret. Forgiveness is the way out, the way to let it go and no longer be reminded of old issues and sadness tied to distant moments.


Forgive yourself for why it happened; forgive yourself for the benefit of letting it go. We can't go back in time. We can't change what has happened, and we can't alter the course of things. We can only live now, with who we are and who we have become. If we have faced challenges, overcome obstacles, and perhaps stumbled along the way, do we not owe it to ourselves to be okay with that? If there are moments in your life that you are not proud of, do not hold it against yourself. See it instead as a moment of learning, of growth. For what was then is most certainly not now. You are not who you were then, a lot has changed. Who you are now is because of your experiences, but that is not all there is to it. You are not a list of all you have done, for with each moment we are altered and we change.


We can't foresee our future, we can't control our present, and we can't change what we were. However, we can be okay with what was, especially ourselves. So if you regret, forgive. Forgive what happened, what you were, and let it go. Say to yourself, I forgive you, I accept you, and I love you. Nothing more needs to happen, those words alone hold the power to change regret into acceptance. You can go from sadness, doubt, fear, shame, loneliness, from all that you have felt and remembered, to allowing yourself to let it go. It does no good to remind ourselves of the things we regret or hold onto past moments. We do not heal this way; we do not grow by this example. We change when we let go, when we are free of our pasts, and able to stand straight in the now of our existence.


So don't let yourself be condemned by what you have done. Don't hold onto that any longer. Release it all by forgiving it, forgiving yourself, and forgiving your past for what it was. Live now, without constantly reminding yourself of what you did wrong, wish you could of changed, or done differently. For the past is no longer there, and the more time we spend focusing on it, the harder it is to let it go completely. Forgive and forget, two very strong words that should be aimed at ourselves. We should give ourselves the benefit of such old advice, direct it inwards, and heal what was so that we can go on to live as we really are, who we are now, and be happy.


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